On Sept. 28 the Psychological Counseling Services at California State University, Stanislaus (Stan State), held their Healthy Intimate Relationship workshop in the Mary Stuart Rogers (MSR) building conference room.
The workshop was run by Susan Brumm, a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor who has been working at Stan State for about two months and Lee Bettencourt, a licensed Clinical Social Worker who has been working on the Stan State campus for 24 years.
The goal they hoped to accomplish through this workshop was to convey information to students about the components of healthy intimate relationships, and how to help them realize if they are in one.
Brumm and Bettencourt covered how couples in healthy intimate relationships deal with conflicts and disagreements and how to identify an unhealthy relationships. Throughout the workshop, Brumm and Bettencourt took turns explaining different topics.
Brumm began the workshops by focusing on when couples begin taking an interest in one another.
She stressed that the importance of a healthy relationship is not just whether or not a couple has fun together.
“Eye contact is important because it helps you feel connected with one another, as well as undivided attention and appropriate touch like a high five or a pat on the back which is more playful than it is aggressive,” Brumm said. “These things are pretty basic, but if you are in an intimate relationship, they should be there.”
Brumm mentioned that couples should be asking more open ended questions to each other and should “listen with the ears and not the mouth.”
Bettencourt then began by explaining how the beginning of a relationship is when people try to put their best behavior forward.
She explained how couples may need to spend more time with the other person to get to know who they truly are.
Bettencourt claims once someone gets to know who the other person is, they must learn to accept them, and she defined acceptance as, “getting to know someone intimately while still respecting who they are.”
Unfortunately, there were not many students in attendance, but the people who did attend greatly enjoyed learning about this topic.
“I feel like the workshops are personable and informative,” Alisha Segmiller (junior, Kinesiology) said. “They are filled with general information that can help a wide range of people. I will definitely come again.”
Students can take advantage of the workshops, and all the other resources, that The Psychological Counseling Services at Stan State offer to students free of charge.
The next workshop, “Who Are You? Exploring Identity” will be held on Oct. 6 in MSR room 260.
Students are advised to sign-up before the workshops, at the Psychological Counseling Services office in the Vasche Library room 185, but walk-ins are always welcome.
