The holiday season has arrived, bringing with it tidings of joy in the form of presents and peppermint-flavored lattes. But underneath all the tinsel and lights lie some potentially awkward situations where etiquette is concerned – like those gray areas around gift giving, proper attire and behavior at a holiday party.
When interacting with others cannot be avoided at holiday functions, certain social rules must be upheld, particularly in a professional or unfamiliar environment. Proper etiquette can help create and maintain a good impression by establishing a sense of mutual respect, so it is important to consider the message one is sending both verbally and nonverbally.
Gift Giving
To college students, the phrase “living on a budget” is borderline cliché. So here’s the bottom line: spend as much as is comfortable.
Gift-giving and etiquette expert and author Leah Ingram discusses her opinion on spending when funds are limited.
“Unless you are the matriarch or patriarch of a family who sets tradition, I doubt you will get the rest of your family to buy into this notion of cutting back,” Ingram said. “That said, that doesn’t mean that you have to match your relatives’ spending, dollar per dollar. You should buy and spend what you’re comfortable spending – not what you think everyone else expects you to spend.”
There are lots of ways to give a loved one a generous gift without breaking a budget.
“Well, you can always go in on a gift with someone else to split the cost,” Ingram said. “And then you can put together a ‘tangible’ gift that fits the occasion.”
She also suggests putting together several smaller, inexpensive items to make one larger gift. These items can range from being useful (like office supplies) to stress relieving (like chocolate, tea or spa-related amenities).
When going to a holiday party with unfamiliar hosts, a gift can be a good way to break the ice, especially if the hosts are a significant other’s parents – and you don’t have to break the bank. Something like chocolates to share or flowers can help make a good impression.
Appropriate Attire
A good rule to follow is that if the outfit or article of clothing is appropriate for a night club, it is probably not appropriate to wear to a family holiday party – particularly if those family members have more conservative tastes.
Meeting the significant other’s family is like going to a job interview; it is important to make a good first impression.
A study by Princeton University psychologist Alex Todorov and co-author Janine Willis showed a microsecond of video of a political candidate to research subjects. With 70 percent accuracy, research subjects were able to predict the winner of an election just from that microsecond of tape, according to Forbes Magazine. Meaning, people can make snap judgments about others with unbelievable accuracy.
The solution: Put extra thought into the outfit, down to the tiniest details. The way a person does their makeup, hair and even the size of their jewelry can say a lot about them. So it’s imperative that the whole ensemble makes the right statement.
“For many men, they do not realize that their watch can say a lot about them,” Vanessa Van Petten, CEO of Science of People, said on making first impressions. “For women, purses and large earrings or jewelry can also indicate a lot to a new person they are meeting.”
Van Petten also suggests getting trusted opinions from friends and family about what message an outfit is sending.
Holiday Party Behavior
There’s nothing more intimidating than sitting down at a dinner table with a line of silverware a mile long at each place setting. Don’t worry; etiquette experts from the “Right or Rude: Where Manners Matter” blog have advice to offer.
“As we learned from the movie “Titanic, when it comes to forks, you always start from the outside and work your way in,” Right or Rude etiquette bloggers said in an interview with The Huffington Post. “Truth is, most of the time people aren’t watching what fork you are using.”
When it comes to drinking, know your limits and don’t get sloppy.
Right or Rude has some guidance about drinking at office parties that can carry over to non-professional environments.
“There’s always a line for everything,” Right or Rude bloggers said. “An office party is an opportunity to bond with colleagues and let loose, but there is such a thing as ‘too loose.’ Keep track of your drinks and make sure to have some food because there’s nothing worse than drinking on an empty stomach.”
For those who prefer not to drink: If an alcoholic beverage is offered, there is no obligation to take it. But be sure to decline it politely.
Proper etiquette is crucial to social interaction; it shows mutual respect for each other. By adhering to the social rules presented in this article, awkward situations can be avoided altogether.